It has been an interesting morning. I have a sweet grandchild who has attended church with my wife and me since birth. But occasionally, my grandchildren will hinder their progress by doing something my son and daughter-in-law disapprove of and wind up on restrictions. I don't have to convince you that a desperate child without an electronic device calls for desperate measures.
My daughter-in-law drops my grandchild off at our house so we can occasionally take her to school. My daughter-in-law called to let me know they were outside so I could open the door. When I noticed she was calling from her phone instead of my grandchild's, I asked why she was calling. She told me my son took my grandchild's phone privileges. Now, remember that my wife, children, and everyone who knows me will tell you I don't miss the fine details. (I attribute that to my years of experience as a police detective.)
So my grandchild comes into the house, and after a brief conversation, my grandchild goes into our den and turns the television on to watch cartoons. What was odd was my grandchild went and sat in the living room. So I asked why would you turn the television on and sit in another room. Then I remembered my grandchild had a tablet and wondered if it was with her. When I asked, I was told no. Now, because I know my grandchildren quite well and relied on the Spirit of the Lord to guide me, I asked for the truth, not a lie. I was told yes about having the tablet. So I asked for the tablet. After some hesitation, my grandchild brought the cell phone out instead. That's when I learned the cell phone that my son took was now in my house because of defiance of his orders of restrictions. In other words, the cell phone was stolen!
For a split second, I thought I should tell my dear grandchild I wouldn't say anything about what happened because I would get some big points as a friend. I mentioned that we could talk about anything if they needed to talk. Then reality set in, and I blew a chance to be my grandchild's best friend.
See. Through many years of being a father, I have learned that parents can't be their children's friends. Think about how many lies our friends told a lie on our behalf. Think about how often our friends told us we were right when we were wrong. How many times they went to war with us, knowing the reason for the fight was our fault to begin with?
I would've become my grandchild's best friend, but in the long run, I would've supported the scheming, lying, and deception that happened to get the cell phone out of their house.
So, I let it be known that I wouldn't support any wrongdoing but would go to the wall for what's right. I alerted my daughter-in-law about the covert operation and gave my wife the phone.
Parents, please pay attention to this real-life encounter I had this morning. I have seen parents defend their children when they knew they were wrong. I have seen parents lie for their children while their children heard them lie for them. I have seen parents ready to fight when someone tells them about their child doing wrong. It isn't love when we uphold our children when they are wrong!
Proverbs 13:24, in The Message translation, states, "A refusal to correct is a refusal to love; love your children by disciplining them."
We can't be our children's friends! We are responsible for raising them to resist wrongdoing and try their best to do what's right.
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